Topic: Adam Lambert and my shyness
May. 1st, 2010 05:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jejo763So, Adam's coming tomorrow. Here. Where I live. Well, not actually where I live, but he's going to be "in the neighbourhood" so to say. And that itself is a pretty big deal as we don't get that many Big Stars around here. And I really like his music. Very much. Followed him through the American Idol contest and cheered him all the way to the end. He's going to be signing autographs.
So, what's the big deal you ask? Why aren't you already on the way to wherever he's going to be at tomorrow? Well, I'm very shy. Really. So shy that I get an almost-panic attack every time I have to speak in public/in front of the class/prepare a lecture/make a phone call to a strange person and so on. I can cope everyday life and all the little details in it, but if I'd have to say something to someone I don't know... Well that thought leaves me absolutely terrified.
So, here I am having this internal monologue about whether or not to go there tomorrow and if I have even one friend that is even slightly interested in coming with me... The debate is endless. And the noises in my head are starting to annoy me.
I'll tell you all the result if there is ever going to be an understanding between me, myself and I.
So, what's the big deal you ask? Why aren't you already on the way to wherever he's going to be at tomorrow? Well, I'm very shy. Really. So shy that I get an almost-panic attack every time I have to speak in public/in front of the class/prepare a lecture/make a phone call to a strange person and so on. I can cope everyday life and all the little details in it, but if I'd have to say something to someone I don't know... Well that thought leaves me absolutely terrified.
So, here I am having this internal monologue about whether or not to go there tomorrow and if I have even one friend that is even slightly interested in coming with me... The debate is endless. And the noises in my head are starting to annoy me.
I'll tell you all the result if there is ever going to be an understanding between me, myself and I.
